I can't help you become a model but I can help you sound more attractive

Welcome back to Communication Examples!

This is the place where I talk about all things related to communication skills and social interactions. Helping you create deeper connections and become the kind of person where people want to have more than one conversation with.

Each issue has an underlying theme which are showcased by 3 examples, 2 tips and 1 Q&A.

Estimated read time ~ 4 minutes

What to expect:

• Mirroring the energy

• The power of touch during a conversation

• The art of subtext

• How shared imagination deepens bonds

• Is there such a thing as being too nice?

3 Examples

1) Mirroring the energy

• Shows you’re attuned to the other person’s emotions - establishes rapport

• Aligns tone and pacing of conversation - makes it easier to relate to each other

• Should be used on occasion and subtly. Overuse can come across as insincere at best and manipulative at worst

2) The power of touch

• Signal of warmth and comfiness. Helps to establish positivity

• Can convey emotions that words may struggle to express e.g. a comforting hug

• Enhanced memory - People are more likely to remember the part of the conversation where there was physical involvement

• Keep it appropriate. Stick to the shoulder, upper arm or forearm. Other areas can be considered points of intimacy

3) Art of subtext

• Piques curiosity - helps with engagement and draws people in

• Useful in conflict resolution. Helps in addressing sensitive topics and keeps the atmosphere constructive

• Introduces creativity by giving others the opportunity to read between the lines. Useful in casual conversations.

2 Short Tips

Engage in shared imagination 

This is a technique that allows you to co-create a mental landscape with the other person to build a unique scenario or story. It’s great for going beyond superficial chit chat and delving into a deeper level of interaction. Here are some way of achieving this:

• Suggestive Scenarios - Introduce a hypothetical scenario that is intriguing and thought-provoking. For instance, you could say something like, "Imagine if we suddenly found ourselves in a deserted island with only three items. What would you choose, and how would we survive?" This encourages the other person to step into an imaginative space with you, creating a shared mental adventure. It’s great if the other person is a bit shy and they need help coming out of their shell

• Balancing Playfulness and Depth - Shared imagination can be playful but it can also touch on deeper themes. Try exploring scenarios that involve personal growth, life aspirations, or even fears. This balance between lightheartedness and depth adds layers to the conversation and allows you to connect on a more intimate level.

Playing with tonal variance

How you say something is as important as what you say. Tonal variance refers to intentionally modulating your voice’s pitch, pace and volume during a conversation. By intelligently navigating these elements, you can create a sonic landscape that enhances your storytelling, emotional expression, and overall charisma.

Try varying your pacing when talking to yourself in front of the mirror. Speed up when talking about something exciting and slow down for the more reflective moments. To be even slicker, leverage well-placed pauses before revealing something intriguing or that will resonate emotionally.

Bonus Tip: Lean in slightly during the pause to build the excitement.

1 Question

Is being too nice seen as weird?

Context and individual perspectives play a crucial role in shaping this perception. Kindness and empathy are universally valued traits but the way they are expressed can influence how others interpret them.

In some situations, when someone consistently goes out of their way to be accommodating, it might raise questions about their authenticity. People may wonder if their kindness is genuine or if there's an ulterior motive. This skepticism stems from a societal cynicism that prompts us to be cautious of intentions that seem overly “friendly“ or “nice”.

Authentic kindness and performative niceness are two very different things. Ultimately you just need to ask yourself whether you’re being nice for the right reasons. If so, do you really care what other people think?

That’s all for today guys. Hit reply and let me know what you guys think of today’s issue - I’d love to connect.

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